Confidence is defined as having faith in one’s abilities and it is not an innate skill. Instead, confidence is the result of hard work and experience. Certainty in your abilities aids performance, builds character, and will help you lead a happier life.
People gain and lose confidence in themselves throughout life. The journey to believing in yourself is more of a rollercoaster than a linear path at times, and that is normal. Everyone experiences the loss of confidence and it can last for minutes or even years, but a loss of confidence is not final. With proper focus and an understanding of foundational components, confidence can always be regrown and bolstered.
The origin of confidence is your mind. That’s right, you have complete control over how confident you feel. It takes some time and understanding to develop a confident mindset, but it is not as difficult as you may think.
Where Are You Looking To Build Confidence?
Confidence is present in all parts of life. You could be looking to gain confidence in public speaking, parenting, conflict mediation, and so many more impactful areas. Growing confidence in various disciplines of life will allow you to better face challenges as they arise. Each challenge you face will serve to grow your confidence further, so it is time to start embracing specific challenging areas in your life!
Start to examine areas where a confidence boost is desired. These areas will often be ones you tend to avoid involvement in or dread discussing. If this is your first time focusing on confidence then you can start in areas of your life where you feel somewhat capable, but see room for growth.
Specifying the area in which you hope to grow allows for your focus to be directed at each stage for clear progress. Once you master building confidence in one area of your life it will become easier to influence other areas as well. The overall goal is a life full of self-confidence and personal growth.
Imagine all of the benefits you can reap from being confident in your capabilities and let those positive thoughts motivate you. This stage of self-reflection is the first part in the mental game of building confidence. Taking it seriously is encouraged, but remember to keep a positive outlook. You are not incapable, you are simply learning.
Tip: While you take the time to reflect on where you want to build confidence also consider your health. This includes both physical and mental health. It can be difficult to keep a positive mindset if your body and mind are not feeling their best.
Regular exercise, healthy eating habits, and mindfulness can all help you achieve a positive mindset. Like confidence building, staying healthy is also a personal experience. Focus on what keeps you feeling your best and if you need help don’t be afraid to consult a professional.
Failure Is Meant To Be Embraced, Not Feared.
With a specific area in mind, consider why you don’t feel confident in yourself when performing tasks associated with that area. When you ask yourself why you feel that way there will be some form of a past event haunting you or a lack of experience.
If it is a past event that you feel went poorly then it may have taken a toll on your confidence in that area or around that skill. Poor performances are commonly labeled as failures.
The word failure has gathered a negative connotation and people seldom want to experience negative things, but it does not have to be that way. Turning your concept of failure into a positive one is a key part of building a mindset that fosters confidence. If you think about it, failing is what makes us stronger and smarter. Failures teach valuable lessons that lead to improvement, but only if you continue to try.
When you let failure define your ability to perform it crushes confidence. However, embracing failure as a means to learn and perform better next time bolsters confidence. Any time you feel yourself recoil from a task you believe you have failed note that emotion and take the time to step into an analytical mindset. Focusing on what actually happened over what you feel has happened and looking for lessons that were learned will guide a more positive interpretation of the event.
Tip: Failure is more than an experience, it is also a fear that prevents experience. If you find that a fear of failure is keeping you from building confidence in any area of your life, take the time to analyze that fear. You will find that the fear of failure is a hallow fear. Even if the outcome is not perfect it is still a learning experience, the worst outcome would actually be not trying at all.
Little Wins Are The Basis Of Confidence
Learning to view failure with a positive mindset is important, but your focus should also be placed on accomplishments. When building a confident mindset it is always helpful to focus on positive thinking, and accomplishments are a powerful source of positivity.
An accomplishment can be anything from winning an award to reading a book on the area you are building confidence in. No beneficial experience is too small to be considered an accomplishment.
Every time you acknowledge an accomplishment lessons are reinforced, motivation is renewed, and self-confidence grows. It is up to you to identify your accomplishments as they arise, so stay mindful of experiences within the area you are focusing on. Over time the identification of little wins will become more natural as your thinking adjusts to a positive mindset.
Tip: Celebrate your little wins and big wins in whatever way you feel fit. Positive reinforcement perpetuates the cycle of confidence.
Your Opinion Counts Above All Others
A huge confidence killer tends to be the opinion of others. Humans are social creatures with an innate desire to fit in and be liked. At times this attribute can be helpful, but for self-confidence it is hurtful.
The negativity of others concerning what you can accomplish and how well you are performing is best viewed through an analytical filter. Criticism can be hurtful and dig at the confidence you have worked so hard to build. Much like failure, criticism has a negative connotation. There are ways to view it positively and find lessons in some forms of criticism, but it is often best to disregard such negativity.
Building confidence is a personal experience in which you are learning to feel confident in depending on your abilities. If you are doing your best to build those skills and you are invested in continuing your growth then that is all that matters.
Tip: The company you keep can be conducive to growing your confidence. If any individuals are persistently negative concerning your personal growth and abilities it is best to avoid them. You can replace negative individuals wth mentors who will positively influence your development of confidence.
Citations:
- Bridges, F. (2017, July 21). 10 Ways To Build Confidence. Retrieved October 16, 2020, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/francesbridges/2017/07/21/10-ways-to-build-confidence/
- Ravenscraft, E. (2019, June 04). Practical Ways to Improve Your Confidence (and Why You Should). Retrieved October 16, 2020, from https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/03/smarter-living/how-to-improve-self-confidence.html